MUJERES UCRANIANAS: LO QUE NADIE QUIERE DECIRTE LA HISTORIA DE UN UCRANIANO
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Historia real de James Maverick, Ucraniano de nacimiento…
Aunque he estado en más de 80 países (y viví en 15), no hay otro país en el mundo donde haya tenido éxito con tantas mujeres, pero tampoco he logrado construir nada sustancial con tantas mujeres. Esa es la conclusión a la que llegué después de salir con cientos de mujeres durante mis 5 años en Ucrania. Ha sido una montaña rusa, por decir lo menos.
En este artículo, quiero abrir y compartir mis experiencias saliendo con mujeres ucranianas desde el punto de vista de una persona que nació en el país pero que en su mayoría creció en el extranjero. Esta será mi evaluación objetiva de la cultura de citas ucraniana desde la perspectiva de alguien que busca relaciones casuales y serias.
Muchos hombres consideran a las mujeres ucranianas como algunas de las más bellas del mundo, una impresión que no se pierde en ellas mismas. Personalmente, creo que tales afirmaciones son absurdas: la belleza, después de todo, es subjetiva. Hay belleza a nuestro alrededor.
¿Qué pasa con las mujeres brasileñas? ¿Qué pasa con las mujeres españolas? ¿Qué pasa con las mujeres mexicanas? ¿Qué pasa con las mujeres colombianas? Son muchos aturdidores en cada uno de esos países (y en muchos otros países).
¿En busca del amor? Tu pareja está en be2
Aunque he visto algunas mujeres hermosas durante mis viajes, debo decir que en ninguna otra parte del mundo he visto un número tan alto de mujeres que pueden llamarse fácilmente hermosas o al menos lindas, o como me gusta decir, «fácil para los ojos».
Esto no sucedió en Brasil, España, México e incluso Rusia (aunque Rusia se acerca).
Importante descargo de responsabilidad: por supuesto, podría estar diciendo esto porque no solo soy un chico nacido en Ucrania, sino también porque creo que tengo cierta debilidad psicológica hacia las mujeres eslavas. Ponga a una mujer eslava con el pelo rubio a la altura de los hombros, y ella me lanzará un hechizo que sería casi imposible romper, incluso si sé que ella tiene problemas y perseguirla está en contra de mis mejores intereses.
Aquí está mi prueba de fuego si una mujer extranjera es hermosa: si transportas a una mujer ucraniana linda o promedio a la ciudad de Nueva York o Los Ángeles o Copenhague o Miami, ¿se notará? ¿Se destacará ella? ¿Se acercarán los hombres a ella? ¿Los hombres tratarán de conocerla? A juzgar por la calidad de las mujeres que vi en la Ciudad de Nueva York en mi último viaje, una mujer ucraniana promedio está definitivamente en algunos puntos por encima de la belleza que la mujer promedio en la Ciudad de Nueva York u otra ciudad estadounidense. Ella definitivamente se destacará.
Pero, aquí en Ucrania, ella es simplemente otra mujer atractiva en un mar de otras mujeres atractivas. Y, por lo tanto, es mayormente ignorada en su entorno.
Extranjero vs. Local
Lo primero que debes darte cuenta es que soy local. Nací aquí, hablo ruso con fluidez y entiendo la cultura.
Pero tampoco soy un típico local. Me veo diferente (algunos dicen del sur de Europa), y tengo un poco de acento cuando hablo ruso.
¿Ser local es una ventaja o una desventaja?
Honestamente, es difícil de decir porque estoy experimentando el lado «local» de las cosas. No sé lo que es ser un extranjero que no habla ruso ni puede realizar una conversión en ruso.
Te puedo decir varias cosas. En primer lugar, como hombre local, debes cumplir con las reglas existentes. Las mujeres ucranianas, al igual que otras mujeres de Europa del Este, no son exactamente fáciles de conectar: te probarán sin cesar de varias maneras (más sobre eso en un momento), y tendrás que responder en consecuencia o ella perderá la atracción por ti con rapidez.
Por otro lado, como extranjero, estás exento automáticamente de estas reglas hasta cierto punto. En primer lugar, dado que la mayoría de las mujeres no hablan inglés con fluidez o incluso en el sentido de la conversación, harás que una mujer sea consciente de sí misma y perderá el equilibrio al hablar en inglés, lo que te dará una ventaja desde el principio.
Incluso si le pide que diga un par de palabras (especialmente si tiene más de 30 años), notará lo tímida que se pondrá repentinamente. Se verá obligada a comunicarse con usted en sus términos, trabajará más duro para entender sus palabras y sus modales.
Esto se debe a que la mayoría de los ucranianos ni siquiera tienen una comprensión conversacional del inglés. Esto definitivamente puede ser una ventaja para usted porque está perdiendo el equilibrio un poco.
Hay un hecho bastante conocido de que las mujeres de Europa del Este no son particularmente aficionadas a sus propios hombres. Que se quejan de que sus hombres son perezosos, se sientan en el sofá y beben vodka todo el día. Se quejan de cómo sus hombres las dan por sentado. Creo que definitivamente hay algo de verdad en eso. Sin embargo, ciertamente no subestimaría a los hombres locales; Si bien pueden ser estoicos y «fríos», entienden a sus mujeres particularmente bien, más que los extranjeros.
Creo que a medida que las mujeres envejecen (30+), tienden a ver a los hombres extranjeros como más adecuados para aventuras al azar y, por lo tanto, tienden a preferir a los hombres locales para construir relaciones más serias. Por supuesto, no creo que una mujer de 30 años rechace necesariamente a un hombre extranjero atractivo y exitoso, pero entiende que la mayoría de los extranjeros que se encuentran en este país están aquí solo por sexo y solo sexo (Puedes agradecer a las hordas de hombres turcos por eso) Además, también existe la incompatibilidad cultural, especialmente si la mujer no habla inglés.
Honestamente, creo que como local, tengo ventajas cruciales. Ni una sola vez sentí que hubiera sido mucho más feliz si hubiera sido un extranjero. De hecho, ha sido exactamente lo contrario: la mayoría de las mujeres que he conocido han sido súper amistosas y entusiastas en salir.
Alphaness (Alpha)
Un aspecto de la cultura de Europa del Este que es muy diferente de América Latina, el sudeste asiático o incluso los Estados Unidos es que hay un cierto elemento de estoicismo y «alphaness» presente. Europa del Este no es exactamente un paraíso en la tierra: hay mucha pobreza, poca seguridad laboral (las empresas pueden contratar y despedir a la gente como les plazca), así que debes ser bastante duro y agresivo para sobrevivir y llegar a fin de mes (por no mencionar incluso prosperar).
Eso es muy diferente de cuando vivía y trabajaba en el Área de la Bahía/Silicon Valley, Haciendo fácilmente $ 150,000 / año escribiendo código de software y estando rodeado de tipos similares (y chicas) que hacían lo mismo o más.
A partir de este escrito, el ingreso medio en Ucrania es algo así como $ 500 / mes. Y eso es en Kiev, la capital. En las otras grandes ciudades, está más cerca de algo como $ 300 / mes.
Esto significa que la riqueza debe construirse desde cero o mediante algunas conexiones de alto nivel. Entonces, si ves a un chico conduciendo un auto caro (Toyota Land Cruiser, BMW 7 Series, high-end Mercedes Benz, etc.), lo más probable es que no lo esté arrendando como lo haría en Estados Unidos, sino que lo compró con dinero en efectivo, con el dinero que ganó a través de un negocio serio o por algún medio corrupto.
Como resultado, hay un poco de cultura despiadada que impregna todo lo que está sucediendo. Toca sobre todo: vida profesional, vida personal, relaciones, etc.
En Estados Unidos, todos pueden estar en una buena situación económica, y las propias mujeres pueden ganar más dinero que los hombres, por lo que hay menos necesidad de cazar a ese «alfa» serio, ese tipo exitoso que está ganando un montón de dinero. Mientras que aquí en Ucrania, donde la mayoría de la población hace lo suficiente para subsistir, eso es mucho más importante.
Transaccional
Otra cosa que debes entender acerca de la cultura ucraniana es que, en esencia, es muy transaccional. Cuando llegué por primera vez a Ucrania después de vivir en el extranjero durante la mayor parte de mi vida adulta, me sentí confundido al respecto, pensando que todos son agradables, amigables y abiertos, y que realmente no podían comprender cómo puede ser tan transaccional, pero cuanto más tiempo pasaba aquí, más me daba cuenta de lo cierto que era.
Ciertamente no es raro que los amigos se presten sumas decentes de dinero entre ellos y para su novia. (O alguna chica que estás viendo) para pedirle que tome prestado $ 500 (o más) en algún punto al azar de su relación.
Esto se limita principalmente a lugares como Ucrania y Rusia y no ocurre en el oeste ni en los países bálticos (Lituania, Letonia y Estonia). Aunque he salido con muchas mujeres que tenían trabajos decentes y ganaba dinero decente, también he salido con mujeres en Lituania y Letonia que no estaban ganando tanto dinero, pero nunca soñarían en pedir prestado $ 500 o más a su novio.
La vida ucraniana está llena de corrupción, por lo que la mentalidad general es «Robemos esto y enriquezcámonos a nosotros mismos» o «Atornillemos a este tipo para que estemos en una mejor posición». Créeme, como un hombre de Europa del Este, entiendo esto muy bien. También puedo garantizarle que otros ucranianos estarían de acuerdo conmigo también. No es de extrañar que pocos de los lugareños tengan algo bueno que decir sobre su gobierno.
Este elemento cultural no se pierde en las mujeres, por lo que, como en cualquier otro lugar, tiene su parte de personas intrigantes que intentan obtener su parte a su cargo.
Al principio, pensé que esto era el resultado de la pobreza y las condiciones de bajos ingresos. Pero después de innumerables conversaciones con mujeres y hombres ucranianos, me di cuenta de que tiene más que ver con Ucrania, más que con el hecho de que Ucrania es un país de bajos ingresos.
Después de todo, América Latina y el Sudeste Asiático también tienen sus regiones pobres, pero la gente no está exactamente dispuesta a arruinarse mutuamente por alguna ganancia a corto plazo. Al menos no es algo tan obvio y directo como en Ucrania.
Tenacidad masculina
En su mayor parte, las mujeres ucranianas prefieren que sus hombres sean duros. Cuando digo lo contrario, no quiero decir que todos deban ser ex convictos, narcotraficantes, narcotraficantes, etc. (Aunque estos ejemplos también funcionarán).
Duro tampoco significa ser rico. Una mujer ucraniana respetaría mucho más a un tipo duro que no es rico que un buen tipo rico. Ella simplemente ordeñaría al buen chico por lo que vale, pero siempre se sentirá atraída por el hombre más duro.
Por supuesto, esto varía según la mujer. Algunas mujeres prefieren chicos realmente duros; otros están bien cuando un chico es un poco duro, pero la dureza debe existir en algún nivel u otro. Realmente no puedo ver cómo un buen chico altruista puede sobrevivir en Ucrania.
Una de las razones por las que las mujeres aman a sus hombres para ser rudos es el medio ambiente y la confianza. Es mucho mejor para un hombre decir lo que piensa, incluso si eso molesta a los demás que estar cerca de un tipo que dice todas las cosas bonitas porque teme molestar a alguien. Los hombres de Europa del Este encajan a la perfección en este proyecto de ley: te dicen exactamente cómo es sin endulzar la verdad.
Decir lo que importa sin buscar aprobación o validación es un rasgo infravalorado, especialmente en el entorno actual donde las personas intentan complacerse entre sí constantemente diciendo todas las cosas agradables, incluso si no son verdaderas, para evitar el revuelo de las plumas.
Otra razón por la que las mujeres se sienten atraídas por los chicos duros es que hay una buena probabilidad de que su propio padre sea así. Después de todo, las mujeres se sienten atraídas por hombres que, al menos, les recuerdan parcialmente a sus padres. La mayoría de los padres de Europa de Este son difíciles y antiguos, por lo que es natural que la mujer vea la versión de masculinidad de su padre como un modelo de cómo debería ser su futuro novio o esposo.
Eso no significa que debas convertirte automáticamente en un europeo oriental estoico y áspero que nunca se ríe o sonríe; es perfectamente bueno ser amigable y hablador, pero siempre debes recordar que tendrás que trazar la línea en algún lugar y tener la capacidad de decir «No» y rechazar las solicitudes de una mujer más de lo que te sentiste cómodo en el pasado.
Esto es completamente diferente a la vida despreocupada y llena de sol de Río de Janeiro, donde todos son amigables y se divierten y su capacidad para relajarse es más valorada que su capacidad de ser duro.
Cuando una mujer ucraniana se siente débil y la estás valorando más de lo que deberías porque estás dispuesto a hacer todo lo que pide (o más de lo que solías hacer en el pasado), ella comenzará instintivamente a probar tus límites para ver dónde terminan. Creo que lo hacen en un nivel subconsciente. No te sorprendas cuando ella rápidamente cruza esos límites y te manipula para que hagas más y más cosas por ella, y pronto te quedas preguntándote qué pasó.
Dominio
Junto con la dureza, las mujeres respetan el dominio. Respetan a un hombre que toma todas las decisiones (o al menos todas las importantes). Respetan a un hombre que es decisivo y no insípido. Respetan a un hombre que sabe lo que quiere de la vida y no tiene miedo de perseguirlo.
Nada hace que una mujer pierda el respeto por un hombre más rápido que alguien que muestra debilidad (voluntaria o involuntariamente), así como alguien indeciso sobre lo que quiere de la vida.
En otras palabras, no le digas a tu novia ucraniana que acabas de perder tu trabajo y no sabes qué hacer con tu vida. Ella puede sentir lástima por ti por un momento, pero su atracción hacia ti se derrumbará rápidamente.
Mientras que en la superficie, ser dominante tiene mucho sentido, debes darte cuenta de que esto es radicalmente diferente de cualquier tipo de dominio al que estés acostumbrado en Occidente. En Occidente, hay un concepto de relaciones 50/50 donde ambos socios toman decisiones y reafirman decisiones con el otro, pero en Ucrania, un hombre decide qué hacer y se apega a él, y la mujer apoya sus esfuerzos.
Por un momento, imagine a una mujer que es incapaz de tomar incluso las decisiones más triviales, y su respuesta a cada «¿Qué quiere hacer?» Es «No sé». Esa es tu típica mujer de Europa del Este. Y su responsabilidad como hombre es asegurarse de que su mujer nunca se quede preguntándose qué está pasando.
Finanzas
El hombre paga. El hombre paga las citas iniciales. El hombre paga por todo lo que invita a la mujer a hacer.
Si la invita a tomar un café, paga. Si la invita a cenar, paga. Si la invita a hacer un viaje junto a otra ciudad o país, paga.
En el caso de un viaje al extranjero caro, el hombre paga por todo y la mujer puede aportar un poco para ayudar con los gastos (o puede que no).
Después de que la relación se desarrolla y la pareja comienza a vivir junta, podría haber una división del 50/50 en algunas cosas, como comestibles o alquiler, pero eso depende de la chica y su acuerdo con ella. Podría burlarse de la idea de que contribuya con dinero (lo que puede verse como una bandera roja de una relación).
La cultura en Europa del Este es muy materialista por naturaleza. Entonces, la pregunta de quién paga por uno de los problemas más espinosos. Y, por mi experiencia saliendo con mujeres de Europa del Este durante muchos años, generalmente es el hombre el que paga por todo, a menos que se hayan hecho otros arreglos.
«Tu bella esposa no es realmente tu esposa»
No puedo decirles cuántos correos electrónicos he recibido de los hombres que viajaron a Ucrania a través de los años, conocieron a una mujer hermosa, comenzaron a salir con ella, la trajeron a Estados Unidos y luego se quemaron cuando dejó al hombre por algo más rico / Hombre más joven / más sexy / más fuerte. Esto sucede todo el tiempo.
Esto se debe a que muchos hombres occidentales son muy crédulos cuando se trata de mujeres de Europa del Este. Piensan que solo pueden volar, conocer a una chica hermosa y luego darle el mundo y ella se convertirá en suya para siempre.
Sí, con gusto tomará el mundo, pero no se detendrá allí, especialmente si hay otro hombre que con mucho gusto le daría aún más. (Recuerda: siempre hay otro hombre por ahí que es mejor que tú de alguna manera, o forma por ahí).
En ruso, tenemos un famoso dicho que se traduce como: «Si tu esposa es muy hermosa, entonces no te pertenece». (Красивая жена – чужая жена)
Lo que esto significa esencialmente es que si estás viendo o saliendo con una mujer hermosa, es muy probable que otros hombres también estén tratando de hablar con ella y seducirla. Además, ya que sabe que es hermosa, exigirá y probará a más hombres a su alrededor y no dudará en saltar a un pretendiente más fuerte si su actual pretendiente se debilita. Las mujeres ucranianas pueden detectar la debilidad en los hombres mucho mejor que cualquier otra mujer que haya encontrado.
Esto es especialmente cierto en el contexto de Ucrania, donde hay muchas mujeres hermosas y, lo que es más importante, estas mujeres saben que son hermosas y que pueden obtener a otros hombres cuando lo desean y siempre que se presenta la oportunidad.
Por lo tanto, a menos que seas un súper tonto tipo Alpha que sepa lo que está haciendo, deberías saber que tu novia hermosa y sexy puede convertirse tarde o temprano en tu hermosa y sexy ex novia.
Si eres un buen chico (o al menos un chico con buenas intenciones), probablemente no durarás mucho.
Si bien eso es más o menos cierto en todo el mundo, creo que es especialmente cierto en Europa del Este (Ucrania y Rusia) debido a las duras condiciones de vida y el deseo de que las mujeres estén con los hombres más fuertes posibles.
Recuerdo haber salido con una mujer sexy hace unos años. Ella quería casarse y luego mudarse a algún país occidental. Aunque tenía sentimientos por ella, Yo estaba desgarrado, sin saber si sus intenciones eran genuinas o si solo me estaba usando. Todo el tiempo mi instinto me decía que algo estaba mal.
Le mostré un par de sus fotos a mi tío, un hombre de la vieja escuela que entiende bien a las mujeres e inmediatamente me miró de una manera que confirmó mis sospechas. Definitivamente esta no era una chica en la que confiaría, y tampoco debería confiar en eso, algo que había pasado por mi mente antes.
El factor edad
Ucrania es uno de esos países donde es bastante común tener una diferencia de edad relativamente grande entre un hombre y una mujer en la relación. No es extraño que un hombre de 40 años salga con una mujer de 21 años. También he oído hablar de hombres de 48 años que salían con mujeres de 18 años.
En términos generales, si tienes más de 30 años, puedes salir con mujeres a partir de los 21 años, hasta finales de los 30 (y más) si quisieras.
He conocido a un chico que tenía alrededor de 45 años, pero le gustaba salir con mujeres de 18 o 19 años. Conocí a otro hombre que tiene 48 años y vive actualmente con una chica de 25 años.
Habiendo dicho eso, esto definitivamente no es aplicable para todos, así que si usted es un hombre de 47 años, no debe pensar que simplemente va a volar y establecer una relación seria con Una chica de 21 años. Puede sentirse atraída por ti por dinero o estatus, pero en un nivel primordial, todavía se sentirá más atraída por un chico de 20 o 30 años.
En general, consideraría que una diferencia de 10 años es el máximo absoluto que podría existir sin comprometer la relación y el riesgo de que su mujer salte a un hombre más joven. No hay nada raro en que un chico de 32 años salga con una chica de 22 años. Del mismo modo, no hay nada de malo en que un chico de 42 años salga con una chica de 32 años.
Si la diferencia de edad es más grande que eso, hay una mayor probabilidad de que tu chica simplemente esté esperando la oportunidad correcta para dejarte por un hombre más joven.
Una cosa que quiero señalar es que no todos los hombres de 45 años son iguales. Algunos hombres están en mejor forma o solo se ven genéticamente más jóvenes, mientras que otros pueden estar fuera de forma, gordos o simplemente parecen mayores. He conocido a hombres de 35 años que parecían 50. También he conocido a hombres de 45 años que tenían 30 años.
En lo que respecta a mis preferencias, tengo más de 30 años y he salido con mujeres de tan solo 26 años, hasta los 35 (en realidad, incluso una vez salí con una mujer de 36 años). Mi punto dulce parece ser las mujeres que tienen entre 27 y 31 años de edad. No tengo mucho interés en salir con mujeres menores de 25 años.
Hay un patrón en el que a medida que la mujer envejece se vuelve más cansada, especialmente si nunca había estado en una relación seria (o le habían roto el corazón en una). Después de la edad aproximada de 33 años, las mujeres parecen perder esa inocencia y chispa en sus ojos que se asocia con mujeres más jóvenes que no tienen tanto equipaje o rupturas.
Citas y emparejar
Todos estos factores se traducen en una cultura de citas única que no se parece a nada que haya experimentado en América o América Latina.
Si bien ha sido relativamente fácil conocer mujeres y tener relaciones casuales, construir algo más fuerte y duradero ha demostrado ser un desafío mucho mayor de lo que nunca había previsto.
Seré el primero en admitir que muchos de estos problemas tienen que ver conmigo. Como alguien de unos 30 años, tengo mi parte del equipaje y la experiencia de relaciones anteriores y eso hace que en algunos casos sea más difícil conectarse con nuevas mujeres.
Pero también tiene que ver con los tipos de mujeres que estoy eligiendo, ya que parece que muchas de ellas simplemente no son adecuadas para las relaciones a largo plazo.
De hecho, la mayoría de mis relaciones han sido bastante a corto plazo. Culpo a eso de Internet y de vivir en las grandes ciudades: es muy tentador conocer a una nueva mujer mañana que tratar de arreglar una relación que perdió su brillo y se ha agotado.
Sin embargo, últimamente, he llegado a un punto en mi vida en el que estoy buscando algo más serio, incluso algo que pueda conducir al matrimonio y los hijos. (No me opongo categóricamente al matrimonio y amo a los niños).
En su mayor parte, he podido determinar de manera rápida y efectiva con qué tipo de mujer estoy saliendo y si tratar de construir una relación con ella sería un ejercicio inútil. Pero ha habido algunas mujeres que no eran exactamente adecuadas para las relaciones a largo plazo que se deslizaron más allá de las grietas y, como resultado, esas relaciones no fueron más que una pesadilla que dejó a ambas partes cansadas y odiosas.
También me obligó a entender a las mujeres en formas nuevas y profundas para entender por qué se comportan como lo hacen.
En resumen, las citas en Ucrania me abrieron los ojos a las mujeres en formas que nunca antes había experimentado.
La mejor manera de conocer mujeres online
Si bien hay maneras de conocer mujeres en la calle y fuera de casa, una de las mejores y más eficientes formas de conocer mujeres está en línea.
Una de las grandes ventajas de las citas en línea es el hecho de que puedes estar sentado en tu sofá en la ciudad de Nueva York, Los Ángeles o Londres y conocer mujeres en lugares como Río de Janeiro, Praga o Moscú.
Entonces, cuando llegas a esos lugares, ya has alineado a todo un ejército de mujeres que están ansiosas por verte.
Por supuesto, también puedes hacer citas en línea usando aplicaciones como Tinder, pero estoy aquí para decirte que, después de usar esta aplicación durante muchos años, muchas de las mujeres que conoces allí, al menos aquí en Ucrania, son buscadoras de oro y de baja calidad.
La mejor manera de conocer mujeres ucranianas hermosas y de calidad es a través de un sitio web llamado Ukraine Date. Ukraine Date es un sitio web de citas donde puedes conocer a muchas mujeres increíbles y de alta calidad.
Si está interesado en obtener más información sobre Ukraine Date antes de unirse, consulte mi revisión imparcial del sitio.
De hecho, he conocido a varios hombres que vinieron a Ucrania, usaron el sitio y terminaron conociendo a grandes mujeres que se convirtieron en sus novias a largo plazo.
Entonces, ya sea que busques una aventura, una novia o incluso una esposa, Ucrania Date es simplemente el mejor lugar para conocer mujeres en Ucrania. Y ni siquiera necesitas estar en Ucrania para hacer eso.
Haga clic aquí para comenzar a conocer mujeres ucranianas ahora
Enfoque
Mi acercamiento a las mujeres se basa en mis muchos años de vida en América Latina. Es el tipo suave, fresco y agradable con un estilo de borde. No es el «juego de imbécil» que funciona en las calles de las grandes ciudades estadounidenses como Nueva York o Los Ángeles.
Este estilo coincide con mi personalidad y ha funcionado increíblemente bien en América Latina, donde las mujeres (y las personas) tienden a abrirse mucho más rápido que en otras partes del mundo. No es raro conocer a una mujer en Colombia y hablar sobre cualquier cosa en la primera cita. Tampoco es raro conocer a una mujer en Brasil y pedirle que te diga que te quiere dentro de una hora de conocerte.
Este no es el caso en Europa del Este. Si bien una mujer típica de Europa del Este es amigable, coqueta y muy femenina, necesitas un poco de tiempo antes de que ella se abra a ti. Algunas mujeres se abren más rápido que otras, mientras que otras no se abren en absoluto y siempre habrá una «pared» entre los dos.
He experimentado todos los lados del espectro: desde mujeres que se abren rápidamente a mujeres que aparentemente no se abren en absoluto, y les puedo decir que estar con una mujer que está cerrada con usted emocionalmente no es lo más emocionante en el mundo.
Atracción y relaciones
En mi experiencia, es bastante fácil crear atracción. A diferencia de lo que ocurre en Estados Unidos, no es necesario conocer un complejo laberinto de ingeniosas frases, anécdotas o devoluciones. Siempre y cuando te comportes de manera fresca y cómoda, y no te pongas nervioso como si fuera la primera vez que hablas con una mujer, estarás bien.
Lo único que debes tener en cuenta es una serie de pruebas que se te presentaran. Por lo general, comienzan siendo amistosas e inocentes, pero si no las conoces o si ella siente que está hablando con alguien que no está acostumbrado a las mujeres de su calibre, perderá el interés rápidamente. Obviamente, cuanto más bonita es la mujer, mayor es la cantidad de pruebas.
Luego, una vez que haya establecido algún tipo de relación y su relación continúe desarrollándose, puede suceder una de dos cosas. En el primer escenario, ella realmente comenzará a gustarte y te respetará como hombre. Ella lo hará porque le has demostrado que eres un hombre de verdad que está listo para protegerla y apoyarla (financieramente).
En el segundo escenario, se dará cuenta de que no eres exactamente el hombre ideal para ella, sino porque no tiene otras opciones en este momento (quizás eres un occidental con un montón de ingresos disponibles que pueden mostrarle un buen momento). Ella pasará tiempo contigo y se acostará contigo a cambio de cenas, regalos, viajes, etc. Por supuesto, durante este tiempo, seguirá buscando mejores opciones y, una vez que encuentre una, cambiará de equipo.
Las relaciones se mueven rápido
En Ucrania, las relaciones se mueven rápido, mucho más rápido que en América o incluso en América Latina. No es raro conocer a una chica, salir con ella por un mes o dos y luego mudarse juntos. Después de vivir por un tiempo, quizás de varios meses a medio año o un año, el matrimonio se convierte en el siguiente paso lógico.
No es raro que las parejas se casen después de solo 4-5 meses de verse (a veces incluso más rápido).
Obviamente, este no es el caso en Estados Unidos, donde las personas pueden tener citas durante años o incluso vivir juntas durante años sin que sea oficial.
La razón principal por la que las relaciones se mueven rápidamente es porque hay menos fricción cuando se trata de conocer gente y construir algo significativo. La gente tiene muchas menos inseguridades que en Occidente; Hay menos dudas sobre los roles de hombres y mujeres, sobre la noción de quién debería hacer qué en la relación. Los hombres conquistan el mundo. Las mujeres conquistan la casa. Los hombres hacen dinero. Las mujeres cocinan y crían niños.
Este diseño de responsabilidades de fácil comprensión contribuye en gran medida a reducir los malentendidos y hacer que una relación sea mucho más placentera y predecible para ambas partes.
Además, en América (y Occidente), las relaciones son algo que se están convirtiendo (o ya se han convertido) en algo parecido a una ocurrencia tardía. La gente está ocupada, todos tienen un hobby para todos los días de la semana. No es raro que una mujer en una ciudad como Nueva York tenga pilates el lunes, yoga el martes y alguna noche de chicas el jueves.
Pero en Ucrania, no funciona así. La gente no está ocupada por estar ocupada. Las relaciones siguen siendo importantes.
Cuando eliminas la mierda que impide que las personas estén juntas, te das cuenta de que no necesitas salir con alguien durante 10 años antes de dar los siguientes pasos y comenzar una familia.
Características de una novia/esposa ideal de Ucrania
Si estás buscando una relación seria o incluso un matrimonio, debes ser absolutamente despiadado en el tipo de mujeres que elijas para estar en tu vida.
En primer lugar, debes estar absolutamente seguro de que la mujer que te gusta (o que amas) realmente te ama. Esto puede ser complicado porque las mujeres pueden ser camaleónicas y decir/hacer cosas que usted espera que hagan.
Hay un par de cosas a tener en cuenta. En primer lugar, si siente que algo está mal, entonces no lo está sintiendo, algo está definitivamente mal. Ya sea que se trate de su comportamiento, sus acciones o algo más, esto es algo que debe investigar y encontrar los motivos de sus sospechas antes de comprometerse.
En segundo lugar, como señalé anteriormente, debe estar absolutamente seguro de que la mujer que ha elegido lo considera a usted como el único hombre en su vida que vale la pena preocuparse (quizás al lado de su padre).
Esto puede ser especialmente difícil de hacer, especialmente si eres golpeado por una mujer en particular y cualquier tipo de gesto positivo o sonrisa en tu dirección te hace pensar automáticamente que el amor es mutuo. Necesita una cabeza fría para evaluar la situación correctamente.
Otro factor crucial a tener en cuenta es una mujer que esté genuinamente interesada en ayudarlo con lo que necesite. Debe ser algo que solo sea importante para usted, no para ambos. Pídale que haga algo por usted que requiera cierto nivel de esfuerzo. Si ella se burla y cambia de tema, no es la encargada. Si ella está más que feliz de ayudar siempre, esa es una gran señal de lo que está por venir.
Además, durante los primeros meses, una mujer puede actuar mejor y hacer todo lo que usted quiere que haga. Hay un término apropiado para esto: versión demo o versión demostrativa.
He tenido relaciones que comienzan increíblemente con las mujeres haciendo todo lo que quería, comprando cosas pequeñas para mí, cocinando para mí, pero después de varios meses, se volvieron menos propensas a hacer estas cosas por mí. Eso es porque estas mujeres dejaron de fingir que eran tan amables y cariñosas y volvieron a ser egoístas.
Esto significa que los primeros meses no son, de manera significativa, un indicador genuino de lo que realmente trata la mujer. Puede ser amable y agradable durante los primeros meses, pero luego se transforma lentamente en su verdadero ser. Por otro lado, puede ser amigable y amable y permanecer así en el futuro previsible también. Nunca se sabe.
Pensamientos finales
Así que ahí lo tienen, una introducción de más de 5,000 palabras sobre la cultura de las citas en Ucrania.
Mientras que, a primera vista, las citas y la construcción de relaciones pueden parecer un proceso sencillo y directo, Hay muchas cosas que se esconden debajo de la superficie que debes entender para tener éxito y, finalmente, encontrar tu sueño novia ucraniana o incluso tú esposa.
Comparte tus comentarios y si eres ucraniano nativo y tienes una historia parecida que contar envíanos tu historial real, la comunidad estará muy agradecida contigo.
Muy Cordialmente, Pablo.
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